Oh, alone time. What’s that?
I honestly can’t remember the last time I had a few moments to myself- relaxing moments, that is. Even during the school year when Nadia would spend two hours in the morning with her classmates, there was always some work I’d need to get done or some errand on the agenda. A phone call, an appointment, an unexpected traffic jam… whatever.
Maybe you can relate.
I find great comfort in knowing that Jesus knows exactly what I’m going through, because if there was ever anybody who walked this earth that didn’t get any time to himself, it was God. Goodness sakes… You can read chapter after chapter in the gospels about the constant attention people were trying to get from Him. As soon as He started His ministry around age 30, I don’t think He got more than a couple minutes to Himself until the crucifixion 3 years later.
And then, I look at how He responded to it. Was He a complainer, a whiner, a hypoglycemic nutcase when He didn’t get food on time? Nah, actually He was hungry as can be, but when 5,000 people came on the scene that particular day just as He was trying to get away to grab a quick bite, He decided to not listen to the rumbles of His stomach & instead let the sound of His Voice take over. He taught the crowds of people & then threw them the greatest picnic of all picnics.
You know what I would have done? I probably would have burst out crying the moment I stepped off the boat and realized that I once again wouldn’t get a break. What would you have done?
I don’t know if it’s just a motherhood thing or just being an adult in general, but for the past 4 years since exchanging the name Marybeth for Mama, I haven’t had much privacy- I go to the bathroom with an audience, my showers are not nearly as private as they should be, I fix my plate after everyone else at dinner time (unless my husband dishes mine out before his, which I gotta give him credit for doing!), and even during the few minutes of solitude I do find, either my phone will ring, my agenda will be in the back of my mind, or I’ll honest to goodness feel guilty for taking time to myself- like I should be doing something more productive.
I wonder how many other people feel that way. Since I’m still trying to work this all out myself, I don’t have much to say other than this-
Jesus knows how it feels to be swarmed and crowded. He never had his own biological child while He was alive on this earth, but that doesn’t mean He didn’t play the role. Heck, He still does. Always has since the beginning. And while He was walking around on the soil we walk on, His flock followed their Shepherd and needed His constant direction & attention.
So, yes, fellow mama’s and overwhelmed lady friends of mine. If we can take comfort in any part of our lack of me-time, it’s knowing that Christ knows what that feels like. And if we just follow His example, we can do it gracefully.
… or at least better than we’re doing it now. 😉